It's Not a Question of Opinion Actually

I think I've realised why I'm single and I have to say that I really don't mind.   

I've got a newish friend who I've been meeting for coffee now and again over the past few months. I met him through some other friends and we seem to get on well (no romance ideas by the way), and the other day he mentioned that he hadn't seen the 2009 JJ Abrams Star Trek remake yet. Obviously I was shocked. As a proud Trekker I felt it my duty to remedy the situation immediately so I invited him round to watch the film. So far so good.

So he came over and it all started off nicely enough. we watched the film and all was well. But then we started talking about current events and this was when the trouble began.

Obviously Britain's vilest dictator had just popped her clogs so this was one of the topics of discussion. Now, I'm ok with a difference of opinion but when you get to the point when you disagree so vehemently that you just want to punch the other person in the face it's best you stop and simply agree to disagree. Well that's what I asked for anyway. 

Let me first also mention that I really hate people that 'play devils advocate' just for the sake of it. Apart from La Tarzane who can do no wrong and advocates for a living, just have an effing opinion will you? I hate it when people try to play devil's advocate just because they think my little mind has never considered the other side of a story. No, I've considered it and I've formulated an opinion thank you. This is how it works when you spend some of your life thinking about things.

What pissed me off wasn't that we disagreed over politics, it was that I told him I wanted to drop the subject as I was getting angry and that we'd fall out if he continued, and he just carried on. If you know me you can imagine how I felt about that; let's just say it did not go down well. What also didn't help is that earlier we'd been discussing horse racing and I said I had a very high success rate of picking winning horses. I'd worked at a racecourse and I knew what all the data on the race card meant - plus I just had a flipping good rate of picking winners. So this was not simply my opinion, but a statement of fact.

But oh no - he disagreed with my experience and the evidence I provided. He said that if it was that easy then everyone would be picking winners. I explained that it wasn't easy but outlined my process and said I actually did quite well using this elimination method. But still he poo-pooed me. Unbelievable. And this is exactly one of the reasons why I left my ex boyfriend. Neither of them could get their head around the concept that I wasn't asking their opinion, I was stating a fact. You can discuss my reasoning of course, but to actually call it into question or dismiss it is like prodding a tiger with a stick. 

None of my female friends feel the need to debate or question my opinions unsolicited. Yes,

they might ask why I feel a certain way but they never question its validity, and if I say I want to drop a subject then they do. It has only ever been male friends or boyfriends who think they have the right to call into question how I feel. It wasn't up for debate and their opinion was not required nor requested - and yet they continued to feel the need to do this even when met by resistance and then hostility.

And would you believe, the next day the idiot had the gall to email me a link to some political data to enforce his opinion even after I told him that I didn't want to talk about it any more. Incredible. Just like my ex, it didn't matter what I wanted, he had to push the matter. I did not take at all well to this and I won't repeat what I emailed back.

It just amazes me that people do this. If I get to the point where I'm warning a person to back off then I really mean it, I'm not just saying it for a laugh. I did this with my ex on occasion and told him he would not like the results if he continued with a certain line of behaviour. He ignored this quite open and honest warning, carried on doing it, I ended up leaving him, and he was baffled at why that happened. If I tell someone that something really annoys me and they keep on doing it then they're clearly a dunce and shouldn't be surprised at the results.

I've never really understood why people do this yet at the same time I don't really care. A friend recently mentioned that he'd noticed that I've never seemed interested in working out people's motives and I replied that was because I didn't see a point to it. I've never felt a need to and you'll never fully know why people do things (they don't often know themselves) so it'll ever only be speculation which is a waste of time. Plus it's their job to work out why they do things not mine; I'm not a psychiatrist nor do I want to be one. I'm only interested in the effect of their actions on me if I'm honest!

And this I believe may be the reason why I'm single. I won't allow anyone to tread on or question my opinions or feelings on a subject and it's always boyfriends (or potential boyfriends) who seem to think that I don't mean what I say or know my own mind. Well this trait is very fixed in me; it's one of the main threads of my character and is never going to be otherwise. People can debate a subject with me but they're not welcome to debate the way I feel about it. And woe betide the person that pushes the issue once I've told them to stop. 

Rant over - I'm off to get my roots done and have coffee with people who don't question me. Have a lovely weekend!

"Please Do Not Enter This Bin"

I've come to a mental arrangement with the driving. I've decided that I just can't go on having meltdowns every few days so I'm just going to do what I can do and slow down with the hours a bit. So my new mantra is "it's just driving".

I've got my test in a couple of weeks and if I pass then I do, and if I fail then I will simply take the test again. If the client waits for me and hires me then that's great, and if he doesn't then he just doesn't. I feel much better and my driving has suddenly improved as well.

The driving wasn't really that bad looking at it, but I've never taken on anything that takes so long to master! I kept getting frustrated seeing complete idiots driving around when I hadn't gotten the hang of it yet. I see people driving appallingly every day and it's galling that I probably drive better than they do yet they have their license.

I was at the 7 Dials Roundabout in Brighton today - this roundabout has 7 roads leading off from it hence the name and even experienced drivers shudder when they speak of navigating it. It's basically a free-for-all situation that can and does turn into a cluster-fuck in the blink of an eye. I'm still apprehensive when I approach it but I'm getting much better.

Talking of complete idiots, all the big dumpster bins in Brighton have a warning sticker on them alerting people to the fact that it's dangerous to sleep in them. On a par with printing that a bag of peanuts "may contain nuts", they've had to state the obvious because some fool did indeed drunkenly climb inside for a kip and was then turned into a human pancake when the binmen emptied the snoozing thicko into the back of the truck the next morning.

So because one solitary dimbo (obviously it was a man, as no woman would sleep in a bin. Even if drunk she would get herself home) at some cost, all the bins in Brighton and Hove now warn people that sleeping in one may not be the best idea. The bloke in question was actually a teacher if you can imagine, but just because one person did an unimaginably stupid thing, they've had to label them all just in case someone else has been eyeing up a bin as a good place to spend the night.

I'm uncertain as to whether they based the image on the victim himself, but here is the Council's impression of what a foolish man looks like. So if you're staggering home from a night out on the lash, do not consider climbing into a bin for a snooze. Your Council may not be as vigilant as ours, but I can inform you with some confidence that it will end in tears.

Kitty McThicky, The Stupidest Cat in Christendom

It's official. We are in the possession of the stupidest cat in England, if not the entire World.

Three long weeks ago we bought Dillinger a catflap so he could come and go as he pleased and we wouldn't have to keep opening and closing windows for his demanding furry arse.

But no. Having tried everything we can think of, the dunce still hasn't sussed out what he's supposed to do. This is what comes of getting a kitten from Milton Keynes. 

The problem seems to be that he'll get part of the way through and then when I slowly let the door go, he then back off instead of pushing against the door and coming through. He's not following through if you see what I mean?

We've tried one of us on either side shaking kitty biscuits like morons, pushing him through, using a chopstick, a feather and piece of string to attract him into hitting the door (and the penny dropping when he sees the bloody door open) and trying to entice him through with an expensive can of tuna. Nothing. Nothing has worked.

We're now reduced to propping the catflap open with a bit of cutlery in the hope that he'll suss it eventually. But having a focused blast of freezing winter air shoot into your home through a tiny door isn't ideal and we're not really sure what else to do! None of my previous cats took more than an afternoon to work it out so he really is setting the bar high. 

Frankly, it's got to the point where I'm embarrassed for the both of us.

Schoolgirl Error

I've just had the awful realisation that I might have blown my cover. Although I'm not generally known as a stupid person, I accidentally emailed the dating guy from the wrong email account and if he decides to Google the name he will immediately find this blog which then goes on to mention him and is clearly written by the person he just met. Bollocks. 

He was pretty intelligent as well so I think he might well at some point. I wasn't thinking and just emailed him from my personal account - my friends wouldn't bother to look the name up plus most of them don't know I write a blog anyway. 

It's not that I've written anything personal about him and I don't talk in detail about people I know anyway, but if you read back you can see I'm a ranty misanthrope with a puppy/kitten obsession which I was hoping to conceal until later! 

Well, I guess the best I can hope for is that he's not as clever as he looks and doesn't spend too much time on the internet. 

Fuuuuck! what. a. dunce.

Ask a Stupid Question...

Talking of dumbing down; I cannot believe some of the stupid questions and reporting that gets offered up as 'news' by our TV stations.

A few examples: a couple of weeks ago there was a little kid who was kidnapped in India; they got him back and the reporter was standing outside the grandparents house and was asked by the studio whether they thought the family may be privy to some information that we didn't know about. The answer unsurprisingly, was that yes, they probably knew stuff that we didn't.

Like most of Northern Europe, we have a no-fly zone over the UK at the moment due to the Icelandic volcano eruption, and yesterday they paid for reporters to travel to each airport to tell us that no planes were flying out. and look - there's nobody here! After the first empty airport story, each subsequent reporter basically started their story with the line "well, it's as similar story here..." no, not similar - it's THE SAME story. What a waste of time - the poor bastards are still camped there so that they can show us a plane leaving at some point.

They were quizzing an airline representative this morning as to whether it was really necessary to cease all flights because passengers were being disrupted and were getting unhappy. The poor fella patiently explained again (they've told us a 100 times why already) without pointing out to this idiot woman that this was preferable to the plane dropping out of the sky like a stone.

It usually seems to be women from the BBC that ask these stupid questions, but I suppose having a woman on the news who isn't just eye-candy in a tight top is a good start...

Brighton Dirty

Leeds is at present I believe, nearly waist deep in stinking rubbish as the bin men strike enters it's third month - yes you heard correctly... MONTH!

Now it's our turn; Brighton bin men are striking due to many issues, not least having the number of their vehicles cut, being told they'd have to work an extra day to cover the shortfall, and temp-staff being axed. The straw that broke the camel coat back apparently was then being told that some of them were fat and lazy. Nice.

I fully support the bin men strike; it's not a nice job, they don't get paid a lot and they need the proper equipment to get the job done. What's worrying however, is that they only started striking yesterday and this is what half the city already looks like. These dumpsters are outside people's homes and shops - The picture above is actually a few doors down from our house - I won't even begin to describe the smell.

They'll need to do something soon though; as it looks like the workers have got the Council over a barrel (as it were) and the seagulls are the only ones benefiting.

And the Winner is....

Yesterday, a 32 year old woman scaled the fence to the polar bear enclosure at the Berlin Zoo and hurled herself in at feeding time. 

Apparently it's not easy to get over the fence, and the woman initially seemed 'elated' as she swam towards one of the bears (seen here eyeing up his lunch) I imagine this feeling of elation did not last long as the bear, pleased that the keepers had clearly decided to put something new on the menu, started to maul her.

Am I alone here in thinking that this woman is surely an imbecile? Why would you do such a thing unless you were a colossal idiot? I'm amazed that anyone decided to help her out rather than pointing her out to small children as an example of a candidate for the Darwin Awards. 

Incredibly, people jump into wild animal enclosures all the time thinking they can give the occupants a little cuddle, and are often bewildered and surprised when the object of their affections tries to rip their head off.

Shaggy Dog Story

I loved this story so much that I had to share it with you - A pony with extremely short legs but a very long body has caused so many people to call the emergency services in the mistaken belief she is stuck in mud, that it warrants a mention on the BBC website!

Hampshire fire crews were last alerted on Tuesday as 'Mayflower' was grazing by the River Test in Southampton. An animal rescue expert said "Mayflower seemed to be a cross between a Shetland and a New Forest pony, making her look like a sausage-dog horse; she could appear to be stuck in mud as she was half the height of other nearby ponies.

He continues; "We have been called out several times for the animal now and it is getting a bit ridiculous; these calls from the public are with good intent as when viewed at long range, this pony looks like it is trapped, particularly if it is standing still next to its mates which are twice its height."

Mayflowers owners are now considering putting up signs to advise passers-by that she is not in any peril....