Living with someone really does have its downsides sometimes. I've never really liked sharing a home and living with just one man is even harder.
I write this because last night I had around 4 hours intermittent sleep because my boyfriend came home again drunk, woke me up, then proceeded to stink the room out with the smell of stale alcohol seeping out of his pores, kept whacking me in the face or ribs with his dead-weight lack of spacial awareness, then snored and snuffled until I eventually left the room to sleep on the sofa.
I'd only been asleep about an hour before he got in as I'd sat up late reading. Often he will go and sleep on the sofa (many arguments about this made it so) but when I got up his mate was already asleep there. After being unable to get back to sleep I eventually got up again, sent his mate home and tried to sleep on the sofa.
But no, my boyfriend then comes bowling through to use the loo before I've slept a minute. Later the cat wakes me up, then he wakes me up again a bit later. I'm knackered.
This used to be quite a regular occurrence. My boyfriend isn't an alcoholic but he loves nothing more than spending anything from 4-8 hours drinking with his friends. Having run a pub for a few years, I find this dull. I've never been a great drinker and find drunk people boring and boorish. But he loves it. we've very different in general but frankly I don't care what he does as long as he leaves me out of it.
I'm really annoyed about this. He's in there sleeping like a baby, and I'm now up having decided it was pointless trying to get back to sleep. Last time he did this he said "but I didn't mean to" to which I replied "I know you didn't - you didn't mean it last time and you won't mean it the next time you do it, and the time after that, and the time after that." And he doesn't, he just keeps effing doing it!
He doesn't do it that often I guess - anything from 1 to 4 times a week and I usually like him being out in the evening so I can have time to myself and catch up on TV on Demand! I'm a homebody and he likes to go out, but I don't know of any friend who would be happy about her boyfriend coming in anything between 2 and 5am stinking of booze so she has to sleep on the sofa.
One of the big downsides to living with someone?
Maybe you should make a list of pros and cons -are you better off with this relationship or without it?
ReplyDeleteWhen living with someone, there's always going to be something, always. You basically give up 50% of your comfort, you adapt and compromise.
If he comes home drunk, he should just sleep on the couch.
Everything else needs to be considered before you put your foot down. If someone has improved my life, I'll let the 4am thing slide, but if they're not being helpful in any way... well, I'll turn this into the last straw.
I'm definitely better in this relationship that without him. But I'm so used to doing exactly what I want that things like this really piss me off. He usually sleeps on the sofa when he comes home like this but often he doesn't even think he's that drunk so tries to come to bed.
ReplyDeleteI keep putting my foot down on the 4am thing - well he can do what he likes as long as it doesn't adversely affect me. We're so different but we both compromise for each other. I hate compromising though, it's not in my nature at all!
the biggest downside to living with someone, or even dating...is snoring/sleeping together (i mean sleeping). I guess up until a few years ago I was accostomed to sleeping in bed with someone, and tolerating noises. But I have gotten quite use to the last year and a half of single sleeping....not just my own space, but the noise. earplugs don't work. Snoring should be illegal. I just cannot sleep listening to someone make such a freaking ruckuss. It makes me want to live out my years with my cats and my dog, and that can't be good...
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