I'm not sure what to do about this blog. I've had it for a few years now and some of you have been with me on this journey (of bitterness, angst, despair and scorn) right from the start. However over time, other people I know have started to read this including a couple of close friends and BBF, and I'm not sure I want them to any more.
The whole thing just spread over time and, although It's not like I want to bitch about these people, I'm finding that I don't feel I can say exactly what I want for fear of worrying or being judged by either friends, my boyfriend or other people I know through freelancing.
When I have a big rant or am feeling really shit about something and want to pour my heart out, I want to be able to say what I like without my friends thinking there's something wrong and that I'm turning into a basket case, when really I'm just having a bad day, and I want to be able to talk about work concerns without worrying that people I know through freelancing will judge me.
Basically, I only want strangers to be able to read about what I really think. I know I could make it so that nobody can read the blog except me, but I like the support and advice that you all give me and that anyone can stumble upon my blog and follow it if they like - I just don't want people I know to be able to read everything that goes on in my head any more.
So what to do? I could either make the blog private so you need to be invited - then invite my virtual Blogger friends to read it; but his would mean that no new readers would ever come across it. Or I could move the blog over to a new platform and call it something else, but all the years of posts on here would be lost.
I know I can import old posts into Wordpress but I tried that once with my business blog and it looked like a car crash. Also, most of you are on Blogger anyway so it's easier for you to read my updates in your summary thing. Maybe I should start another new Blogger blog and then invite you to view it...?
*long sigh*... any suggestions?
Just start another anonymous blog somewhere on the internets & don't tell anyone!
ReplyDeleteoh blimey... that's a tricky one. I totally understand. More & more people I actually know are reading mine as well and I feel it impacts on what I write about definitely.And not in a good way because I have to be careful. Please keep writing it, but maybe you could start a new one with a link to the old one so people can still read your old posts. Invite people you want to come with you to the new one and keep it secret from the people you don't want to read it.It feels wrong to be keeping something secret from BBF but maybe he would understand if you told him it existed and why, but didn't tell him the address??
ReplyDeleteI think the private blog with invitations would be a shame as its part of the enjoyment of blogging to get new followers and commenters.
Whatever you decide to do please don't stop writing and please let me visit the new one!!
I know you try hard to keep work and private lives separate and you are totally entitled to have a place to rant where colleagues/clients/family etc are not invited. As you say, ranting is not a sign of madness its a way of clearing our minds and getting objective advice. You have certainly given me excellent advice over the years, precisely because we are strangers, but strangers who have an insight into each others lives with no strings to pull.
Good luck with your decision. I shall keep an eye out for your new blog if it comes!!
Sarah
x
Dr Paul - I could, but then I would lose all the friends I have on here.
ReplyDeleteSarah - Thank you for your advice; this is exactly why I like having this blog! I'd tell BBF if something was important, but otherwise it's nice to be able to spout off about what I like without him worrying or thinking I'm oversharing or something. I've just noticed that I'm not posting much any more when I actually have a few things on my mind I wouldn't mind your opinions on.
I don't think it's good to have to censor your own blog because of who reads it. I just wish I could go back and keep it more secret! I think I might start a new Blogger one but link back to old posts sometimes. I would just have to let each person who follows me know the new address I spose - without friends looking at their site to see it too!
As you know I had a similar dilemma a little while ago on my blog. In the end, I decided just to keep writing it and not to worry if what I was saying was too personal for real life friends to see; I just made sure that I was always fair in what I wrote if it concerned other people. So basically I can't really use it to rant any more, and in some ways that's a good thing - tempering my posts helps me to consider other people's points of view while I'm writing them.
ReplyDeleteIt is a little bit inhibiting sometimes, but I've still written some really very personal stuff on mine, during periods when I have been very worried or stressed. My friends have always been very supportive because of it, which has been nice, and I think that they can tell once they speak to me in person that things often sound worse when written during your darkest hours than they actually are. Once they've spoken to me in person they usually seem reassured that I was just having a bad or anxious day but I'm not on the point of topping myself or anything.
In your case, if you really are finding it hard to keep saying the things you want to say, then the blog is perhaps no longer serving its original purpose, and I think setting up a new anonymous blog and being careful who you give the address to might be the best way forward. Whatever happens, keep writing!
hmm... my brother, sister, cousin and several X's read mine - I hate it and have tried very hard to 'curb' much of what I say in case of starting a family fight or opening old wounds... You have my sympathy.
ReplyDelete